Rules and Lines
by morbane5ever
Summary: Loki knows the rules, but that doesn't mean he abides by them. (Thorki fic, incomplete)
1. Part 1

AN: Sorry that this is so short, I haven't gotten around to writing more yet. This would be approximately twice as long if I had stopped being lazy and just written more today... And I still suck, but oh well :)

* * *

There's nothing special about me, really. I'm just a lost little boy, trying to figure out how he got where he did, and trying to find someone to help him make sense of life.

I had thought I found that person. But I guess not.

Because "that person" wouldn't have left so abruptly. "That person" wouldn't have shut me down so quickly that it made my head spin. But he did. He did.

There had been something special between us. Or, I thought so. I mean, he was perfect, with his sandy blonde hair and his blue eyes... And he wasn't really my brother. I tried to justify my actions- and his- using that simple explanation.

But that explanation didn't make him stay, did it? No, no. He left me all the same. Left me in pieces, left me shattered. Left me to put myself back together again. Because no one else would come near me, not after they heard. No one would look me in the eye. He was still the prince, he was still loved. They blamed it all on me.

After I discovered my true heritage, things changed between Thor and I. We were different after that. He started out as a friend. A caring, trustworthy, understanding friend who helped me through the shock of my little discovery.

But things couldn't stay that way. I was searching desperately for "that person", he was right there for me.

And I was never one for rules.

* * *

"Loki!" He called through the cavernous halls. He knew where I was. We were both aware of this fact. But he would pretend to be suprised to see me sitting in the library, reading an obscure book and writing notes furiously in a leather-bound journal.

I could hear him walking through the aisles between the towering bookcases, all but running to where he knew I would be. I smiled a little, but kept myself from looking up in anticipation, not wanting to seem too eager. I'd rather seem bored with his games, I'd rather tease him.

"Loki?" He called again, tentatively now.

I looked up briefly, trying to appear disinterested. "Hm?" I flipped the page of the large book in front of me.

"There was something I wanted to tell you," he said, and I knew what was coming. Thor wasn't an idiot, but he was naïve, and I knew him well enough to know how to string him along, how to get the result I desired from him.

"Yes?" I asked, putting my pencil down and turning to face him.

"I just.. Well, I was..." He shrugged awkwardly, unable to express his emotions properly.

"No wonder you have so much luck with the ladies," I said, somewhat sarcastically, though he looked so beautiful when he was flustered, a sight not many had the privledge to see.

"Shut up," he said, punching my shoulder playfully. I laughed, then took a step closer to him and stood on my toes so I was the same height as him.

"Just kiss me already," I whispered.

He did what I asked. Because he loved me, and he trusted me. I loved him all the more for that. No one else here trusted me. Distrust is tolerable, though. I would've rathered that, in hindsight.

I kissed him for a moment, his lips crushing mine clumsily. I could taste the faintest trace of honey inside his mouth, but I forced myself to break the kiss before I became to absorbed in chasing that taste. "Not here," I whispered. "Not now. Later."

"When?" He asked me.

"Tonight. I'll be waiting for you."

"Promise me," he said, almost demanding it.

"Of course," I said without pausing.

He looked at me expectantly, waiting for something? Waiting for- Oh.

I cleared my throat. "I promise," I said, feeling terrible even as I said it, because even if I could keep this promise, could I deal with the consequences? I doubted it, and I regret that promise now.

"Until tonight, then," he said, taking my hand and kissing the back of it gently.

"Someone might see you," I mumbled as he left. "You need to be more careful."

He didn't hear me.

* * *

What time is it? I looked at the door nervously for the eleventh time. 'It's dark out, and he should be here by now,' I thought. I started to feel silly about all of this, telling him to meet me here, kissing him, even my plan to make him confess his love for me is starting to feel absurd.

Until he walked through the door, wearing only a light pair of pants, and grabbed me by my dark green tunic.

"Good evening, Thor," I said, surprised.

He just kissed me, all of his embarrassment and nervousness from earlier gone and his usual arrogance in its place. I was his to do as he liked with, and he knew it all to well.

For a short moment, I contemplated putting up a fight, but in the end decided that I didn't have the strength of patience to do so, and kissed him wholeheartedly. I felt safe with his strong arms around me, and I had begun to rely on his touch to keep me sane, a fact I had thought I would never voice.

When he pulled away from my lips, I had to hold back a slight whimper. He stared into my eyes, and I was transfixed by the startling blue of his own. I twisted my fingers into his blonde hair and tried to figure out what he was thinking. Was he wondering if he would regret this? Was he worried about me?

"I love you," I whispered, taking in the beauty of his face with wide eyes.

He lifted a hand and stroked my cheek gently. "Has anyone ever told you how beautiful you are?"

I laughed quietly. "Has anyone ever told you that you're a hopeless romantic?"

He laughed with me for a moment, then looked at me solemnly. "Loki..."

My heart skipped a beat, out of either excitement or fear. Possibly both.

"I love you too," he said softly. "More than you know, I think."

I couldn't contain myself any longer. I pulled him towards my bed and hoped I wouldn't sleep tonight.


	2. Part 2

AN: Sorry that this took so long, I've been spending a lot of time watching Cry play video games. And I've been pretty uninspired lately. Sigh.

* * *

I watched the sunlight stream through the curtains and fall on his face. Even then, he was the favoured one. Even when it was just us. His hair was messy and tangled and fell in front of his face, and which was completely smooth, the slightest smile on his lips. I brushed his golden hair behind his ear with gentle fingers.

"I love you," I murmured, even though he was asleep. The guilt I had been feeling all night last night swelled and made me feel sick. I slipped out of bed and hastily pulled on some clothing. He mumbled something and sighed in his sleep as I paced back and forth across the floor. The sick feeling was worse than ever, and I felt like I would vomit.

What was I thinking? I was a fool. I had never felt guilt this strongly before. He was my brother. "What have I done?" I whispered. It was then that I realised that I had been too distracted last night to even think properly. Heimdall.

"Damn!" I cursed loudly.

Thor's eyes fluttered open. "Good morning, beautiful," he said, his voice heavy with sleep.

"Shut up!" I snapped. No. No, how could I have been so stupid? "I'm an idiot," I hissed.

"Loki...? What are you-"

"Heimdall," I said flatly.

His eyes widened. "Oh no."

At that exact moment, I heard footsteps in the hall. "No," I breathed, looking around wildly for an explanation or a solution of some sort. The door was thrown open before I could even use magic to help me.

"The Allfather requests your presence," a man said in a gruff voice.

Thor looked at me, asking for help maybe? I just hung my head and looked at the floor.

The man in the doorway raised an eyebrow when he realised that Thor was naked and in my bed. "Get dressed." He left without another word. There was nothing more to be said.

"Leave," Odin said sharply to Thor. Thor had already been suitably humiliated by his father. That was all the punishment my brother would get.

"Loki," Odin said, his voice harsher than it had been with Thor.

I bowed my head in a mix of respect and humiliation.

He just watched me for a moment. "Get out."

He didn't have to explain. He wanted me out of Asgard. He wanted me and my lies away from his son. I was banished, exiled, cast out.

"Where do I go?" I asked.

Two guards walked up and grabbed my arms to take me away. I didn't resist. I didn't fight against them as I was sent to who-knows-where by Heimdall. I just kept my head down and silently obeyed. Maybe my exile would only be temporary if I was a good boy. Doubtful, but I was at least intelligent enough to attempt it.

* * *

When I arrived at my destination, disoriented and lonely, I looked around to determine my whereabouts. I laughed when I realised. Of course. Midgard. I think Odin liked sending his exiles here. To hell with being good. I could enjoy myself here. The mortals were fun to play with.

I smiled at the man in front of me, the way a cat smiles at their prey. The fingers of one of his hands fiddled with the hem of my t-shirt, the other tugged the waistband of my jeans impatiently. I wasn't really hearing the words he was saying, but that didn't matter. It was all part of the game. Him, the gay bar, the drink in my hand that I hadn't even taken a single sip of. All part of the game. My game.

"So do you have somewhere to be tonight?" The man asked. "You could always come back to my place…"

"How much are you willing to pay me?" I purred, running my fingers through his hair.

"Name your price," he said without blinking.

"I'm free. All night, in fact," I replied, letting him pull me in for a kiss.

Sometimes I felt remorse, wished I hadn't allowed strange men to touch every part of me and taste my skin. Sometimes I hated the feeling of their hot breath on my neck, or their hands on my hips. But very rarely. I enjoyed my game most of the time. I just really missed him. My brother, Thor, the thunderer. My lover. I felt more guilt from that than from the game. Though guilt wasn't exactly a feeling I was unused to.

"What's your name?" He asked me.

I raised an eyebrow. "Logan," I lied.

He smiled a little. He didn't tell me his name, but I didn't mind. I hadn't told him mine either.

"Let's go somewhere else," he said, his voice heavy with desire.

I put on my best whore's smile. "Sure," I said, licking my lips. His hand slid from the top of my jeans to my crotch for a brief moment. I ran my hands over his well-muscled chest and pressed a kiss to his jaw. He wrapped an arm around my waist protectively and pulled me towards the exit.

"You leaving with this goon, sweetie?" The bouncer asked me, eyebrows raised. He saw me pretty much every night, arriving alone and leaving with some brute of a man. His job wasn't to ask questions, but he understood well enough without any explanations.

"If I'm not back tomorrow night, you can call the authorities," I said teasingly, feeling the strange man's hands all over my body.

The bouncer laughed and shook his head. "Let's hope I never have to do that, honey."

"I know what I'm doing," I said, my playful tone slipping a little as the man dragged me to his car. But the thought made me pause for a moment. What was I doing?

"C'mon," the man said impatiently. I went with him, but playing the game with a little less fervor than before.

"Let's go," I murmured in his ear.


End file.
